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Standing next to the window of my mentor’s classroom watching the PYP students running and playing around the basketball court. I don’t know what they’re actually playing. They’re yelling, shouting, running, chasing their friends. And for sure, they’re having fun. There is only fun and innocence.

*Ah, I wish I could just capture the noises they made, too!*

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well, I used to be there…. I used to be one of them.

I used to be a kid, whose mind was only thinking about playing around and having fun.

I used to be in that time, when the hardest decision was which flavor of ice cream I wanna have.

I used to be in that moment, when the most heartbreaking moment was when my teacher was angry at me.

I used to be there, where the only place I know was home and my playground.

I used to be there, where all the other kids were smiling genuinely.

It was so long ago.

When life was way simpler than it is right now.

Welcome to the club, big girl!

Where ice cream is no longer your thing. And playground is no longer fit for you to play in.

Where you finally found out that brokenheart is just like something you call as breakfast.

Where you finally figured out that it is so hard to distinguish which smile is genuine.

Life is no longer about running in the rain, but sometimes running from the reality.

Life is no longer about playing with the sands, but sometimes playing with the truth and integrity.

Life is no longer about blowing up bubbles, but sometimes blowing up at immorality.

Life is just not the way I used to know it.

I’m 21. and that’s the reality. Life must be tough for grownups, mustn’t it?

Life goes on. Face it.

When pain is even more real than euphoria,

I know that this is world, not utopia.

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